I said it. I'll admit it.
I like it. Even though it's totally a Hallmark holiday and really is sorta lame.
Now that I'm not in highschool I don't have wild dreams of receiving a single red rose in my car, my locker, at work, on my pillow, etc...with a note saying "I'll die without you. Love, Your Secret Admirer."
Although, that would be kinda cool still.
I'll admit that too.
I digress.
My point is that now that I'm an adult and
Um. Well at least not from being alone, anyway. I keed, I keed!
Thus I have a list of things I don't want on Valentine's day. Husbands? You would be smart to pay attention to this list.
Okay, maybe just my husband.
Without further ado; my list:
The Hoodie Footie from Pajama Gram
This is advertised on TV as being made of my favorite soft blanket from when I was a kid and has feet just like when I was a little girl! And just in case it's raining, you know, in my freaking house, I can use the hood when I need it!
Adding insult to injury, my husband may forget my name! But not with this clever addition! My name can be proudly displayed in embroidery on my chest.
It's really for men who have more than one wife running around looking like a tard. Need to have a convenient way to remember us!
Oh, and also? When you're thinking about V day and romance and sexy time? You don't want to be reminded of when you were a little girl wearing footies sitting on your dad's lap and getting noogies.
I dunno. Just doesn't work for me.
Then there's this:
He's cute. But I'm not 5.
And you know what else? If my husband goes and spends anywhere from 69 to 100 dollars on a stuffed animal? I'm gonna be pissed. Fill my gas tank for that amount of money.
Speaking of money if he spends 80 bucks on a pair of Hoodie Footie's I'll have to seriously question his sanity altogether.
But wait! In case you want your bear to look like a tard too match you? There's this:
Finally? I don't want something like this either:
Romantic Kit or some Crap:
I really don't want him to waste money on this either. A couple red votives, a cheap stapled glossy and some smelly oil. I can make that stuff on my own. But I won't because it's lame.
What?
I know, I know, "Mims, you have to be the most un-girly non-romantic person ever!"
No. I am not.
Okay, so I may have asked for a Dust Buster one year, but hey, I needed it.
But I like evenings in with my husband, too.
He knows me well enough to know that I like take out:
And then we can watch our movie. Doesn't every couple have a movie?
I'm high class like that.
So. What do you want for V day?
58 comments:
ew. McDonalds.
i think i just threw up a little.
my husband hasn't said a word about Valentine's Day.
He did grab my boob on his way to bed at 8pm (remember he leaves for work at 4am).
so i guess THAT was romantic.
but it wasn't officially Valentine's Day yet so....i can't really be sure if that was my gift or not.
But it most def was HIS.
ahhh romance.
and the easy way out.
I usually don't get a thing but this year The TO surprised me with a Keurig and a book from my TBR list.
Haha the Boycotting fucker is back.
What do I want with my VDs?
A little rub n tug. What?
Hi,
Just discovered your blog.
I loved your "about me" comment of if you want to feel better about yourself go to Walmart.
So what is the "living in France" tittle? Are you living in France?
Kirsty
Hey I have those footie jammies and my DH had them monogrammed to say Seriously HOT...I love them and so does he...they have a back door!
I'm totally joking, there are no angry dolphins in my house!
My DH sends his girls flowers and Edible Arrangements every year. He is trying to make it impossible for any man to even try to one day walk in his shoes!
Smart man!
I'm hoping for a mani/pedi gift certificate. Hell, I came right out and asked for it so it better be tucked in my card.
And for the record, V-day at our house is very one sided...I believe wholeheartedly that it is a made up day for a husband/boy to show is love and appreciation for his wife/girl.
Yep, I said it, I'm totally sexist on this one!
My husband bought me a cricut cartridge and peanut butter cups. He knows me so well. :)
My first boyfriend (I was 21 - a late bloomer) sent me a Vermont teddy bear for the Valentine's Day we spent together. It was cute, and I still have it (I refuse to part with the damn thing), but I was kind of annoyed that he'd spend all that money on a bear. I wish he'd saved for when I made a trip home - I was living eight hundred miles away at the time - and taken me out to an extra nice dinner, or something along those lines. Or used the money toward a trip to come and visit me. But no.
Though it wasn't any worse than the jewelry he'd gotten me for my birthday and Christmas. Both things gold. I hate gold. Definitely a silver (ok, I could deal with white gold) kind of girl. Glad I got some jewelry I didn't particularly like to wear, and a teddy bear who still sits on a shelf. Great.
I would be seriously happy with a iTunes card, momma needs some more music. I wanted some chocolate covered strawberries, so to save some $$ I made them myself and they was gooood!
My feet would sweat in that contraption. How sexy!?!
I just want my husband to take out the trash.
I'm not a big Valentines person. Dinner with the hubs and some time without the kid and I'm happy. No cheesy presents please.
Great list, and so agree about the pjs if hubs forgets my name after 30 years of marriage then there is no hope. The cost of those gifts is outrageous, take me out to eat instead.
If husband buys me candy he risks me saying. "I'm on a diet" if he doesn't he risks, "what no chocolate" guy can't win.
Wait.. But I really want a Hoodie Footie.. Can we still be friends?
First of all, I seriously thought the name on the hoodie footie pj's was supposed to be on the ass-flap. And then my mind started going to a place where I thought of all sorts of other phrases that could go there instead. But then I read that it's supposed to be over the boob. Romantic for when you're going at it and your man goes to kiss a boob and gets a good, hard glimpse at your name. Handy. Although, perhaps I should raise the point that it's practically impossible to go hard at it when you are covered from neck to foot in clothing. I seriously don't see the point in this one.
Now I'm off to blog about Neal's best friend in the unit received a rockin' remote control car from his wife and Neal got a stuffed monkey from me. *FAIL* Happy Valentine's Day, love!
My husband got me a hoodie footie for V-day. And as much as I've made terrible fun at the thing ever since hearing of its existence...it's actually kind of awesome, in a pleasedon'tletanyonecomeoverandseemeinthisorIwilldieofembarassment kind of way. *hides in shame*
LOL! She SO looks like a pink kangaroo!
I may go out to lunch with my hubby if we can find a time when neither of us are having meetings. We went to dinner last night at Applebees using up a gift card we got for Christmas. VERY nice time!
I hope you get your tank of gas!
ha! You crack me up!! But I TOTALLY want some of those pajamas!! Holy moly - i would NEVER be cold! LOL!
Cory and I went out of town for a weekend Alone - that was our valentine's to each other! The end!
Ahhh Vday. Def a Hallmark day for sure. I actually got running shoes...which I was pretty stoked about.
A hood?? I was almost ready to go buy one until I saw there was a hood. LAme! :). We are starting something new this year- Eric and I went out over the weekend and tonight we are having a fancy Nancy dinner with the kids.
I would DIE in those pajamas!!! Do you know they have those for grown MEN too? That is all shades and all levels of wrong in my book.
bwahahahahaha!!!! Your dinner and a movie choices are perfect!! I don't want jammies, teddy bears or a sex kit either! Guys who come home bearing that schlock as a thoughtful gift are fooling no one. On the way home from work they thought, "Oh Shit! It's Valentine's day! What's open?"
Ok, I have to say, I'd probably like the hoody thingy but without the footie - don't like anything on my feet, they get HOT! lol! Every word you said had me cracking up though :)
Happy VDay MiMi! And what's with the Anonymous hater?? Asshat! Lol!
Ok, my husband's away right now. I called him to tell him: Please don't spend money on flowers. Instead, I'll email you my account and card info for my starbucks card. Then, you can reload it for me.
Starbucks- my love language. He was thrilled.
Oh! I almost forgot- I laughed so hard when you were describing those pink hoodie pajamas. I think on top of everything else, they are pepto pink.
I'm like you. Keep it simple, very, very simple. I hope you have a great day today with your sweetie!
Brilliant! Great idea. :)
We.....we don't have a movie. Or a song. I think we broke some sort of sacred code.
What defines a couple's movie? Because the first one we watched together was crap and I fell asleep during it. :)
Oh, Mickey D's, how I loathe thee.
I agree with Shawn. I've always felt like it was the man's responsibility to spoil ME on Valentine's Day. Will it happen? Eh, prolly not, money's tight, but he better get me a damn card and some good chinese take out at least!
I am carrying his kid, after all.
I want a whole day to read a book without any damned family members wantsing to talk to me. What? Not romantic enough?
I want....whirled peas!
Okay, no. Let me see.
A "frozen concoction" on the beach, at sunset?
He made me dinner (fancy cheese and crackers and Salmon) and bought me a really nice bottle of wine!
I like those jammies....
Lol! The footie pajamas are hilarious! I was laughing until I saw the MATCHING BEAR (dude, who makes this stuff!) I don't like cliche gifts on Valentine's day either. I would want...someone to make me dinner before having a relaxing evening at home. That's it! :)
That's a classic. We prefer Billy Madison.
I totally love you! If I had $80 to spare, I would send you those footie pajamas JUST to see your reaction.
I laughed so hard at this post! I've missed visiting my bloggy besties. Good thing I can stalk you other ways too, right???
Happy VD! I know you don't want it, but I would love to see you in that Hoodie Footie.
Happy Valentines Day!! I got everything I wanted a great husband and a beautiful daughter I get to spend the day with. Oh and Joe bought me some lotion and body spray from bed bath and beyond!! YAY!! It has been a great day!!
um, no matter how haught the girl is, those damn pj are not sexy at all.
comfy, maybe...sexy..no.
~Becca
p.s. if you see my hubby tell him I better get my damn iPhone.
I can't wait for Valentines Day to be over with, cause I HATE,HATE, those damn comercials. Those stupid women squealing cause they are so excited for a stupid stuffed bear or pair of pajamas. Man they make me want to puke. And as for the oils and junk. All that means is he is horny. The best Valentines present is to just leave me the heck alone and let me just go to sleep.
HaHa, definitely the funniest V-Day post I've read. But I'm not too happy with you for making me want fast food. Tsk Tsk.
ha. I think THIS is part of the reason I don't like Valentine's Day. I'm just too dang pragmatic. Flowers? Lingerie? WASTE OF MONEY.
oh and the pink and red thing.
HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY MIMI. I LOVE YOU GIRL.
ha ha ha I love you, you are hilarious! My hubby is lame, like SUPER lame. He never does anything for Valentine's Day. When I was working he would send me flowers but only due to peer pressure I think. I'm with ya on not spending that much on something so stupid. Buy me a new pair of black uggs instead. Not like that will happen but whatev... Oh I did get a honey, happy valentine's day I love you. Yep, that was my gift. Ahhh how I love him... pfffft!
I had the same high school dreams as you! I bet most of us did. I am not real big on the mush stuff either. I feel I am pushing the mush this year by getting a frame that says: Life, Love, Laughter and Happily Ever After. Haha! And umm no to the romance kit. I am there with ya. Not McDonald's...maybe pizza so it can be delivered. Our movie would have to be "Pure Country" cause we are a little bit sappy. haha.
Wow you found some super awesome things. I so wanna get some super awesome footie pjs
I want quiet. a two year old and a seven year old can make a surprising amount of noise. Nick and I will have the anniversary of our first date on the 26th, so we are going to celebrate that. We will have been together 18 years then. Means more for us than Valentines does. And our movie is Groundhog Day.
Okay...you had me rolling. The footed pj's and matching Vermont teddy bear was priceless. You know that SOMEONE in the world got that exact gift. Seriously, what is up with those Vermont teddy bears? Ugh!
V-day to me was when my husband got his balls snipped, we called that V-day.
But if your referring to Valentine's Day....he is gone..so I celebrated with my 4 kids and guess what...I took them all out to eat at McDonalds tonight, you know...cause I'm high class too! I like how you and I roll *wink!
Really who thought the hoodie and footie was a good idea. I can only imagine at their twisted mind.
My two kids love Dumb and Dumber - they may have watched it 200 times this summer, but who counts after the first 50! They may also be able to quote every single line.
Hope you had a good day!
We're having the most unromantic V day ever thanks to the baby, my classwork and a boring special on PBS. I hope you had a fun night!
Just this morning I saw yet another hoodie footie commercial and I found myself wondering if the idiot who came up with that one has been fired yet.
I like Valentine's Day. Gimme stuff.
I like conversation hearts.
I used to LOVE getting valentine's in school, and I LOVED getting secret admirer stuff in high school...even though it was always just from creepy guys.
I'm not gonna say what I want because I want you to know what I want without me telling you. It's fine. I don't want ANYTHING. But if you really get me nothing I will cry because I got you something and GOD DON'T YOU EVER THINK OF ME AT ALL?!?!
xoxo
It'd be hard to get any "action" in those pj's!
I have never seen those pjs advertised! How could they think any woman would want those??? Think of what a pain it would be if you had to go to the bathroom in the middle of the night. No thanks.
AHHHH THE HOODIE FOOTIE!!!! I had no idea that there was an embroidery option. *adds to birthday wish list*
So, what'd you end up getting?
Oh, the bear in the footie pjs is hilarious!
Hope you got something a lot nicer for Valentine's Day!
I wanted and got the same thing I want and get every year - a date to the RV show!
Also dinner and the most amazing bouquet of flowers that are in the other room and I can smell from here which are totally awesome and so sweetly thoughtful and everything, but did I mention the RV show? Woohoo! RVs!!!
I like RVs.
Oh boy. I hope no one buys those awful pj's so they will stop making them.
We had Jimmy Johns on VD with a bottle of wine. Yeah, we're high class too.
Oh, and we do have a movie, it's Forgetting Sarah Marshall. But sometimes it's Grumpier Old Men.
Bahahaha to this post. Then another Bahahaha to Mamarazzi!
I don't hate V day, but it's not a big deal around here either. Hubs and I did spend the day together before he had to go to work that night.
And he got me some awesome RSL earrings...so that was sweet.
When did the Vermont Teddy Bear become a thing? I wasn't paying any attention, then WHAM! It's advertized on ESPN radio every 5 minutes.
I'm class like that too.
We ate Pizza Hut.
"OUR" movie is Tommy Boy. It's sooooo romantic.
My husband must have read this, because he didn't get me any of that...or anything else, to be exact.
Oh my goodness, those pajamas are hilars!!! I'd totally rock them if I were camping or something, lolol.
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