Monday, May 14, 2012

A Broken Humerus Isn't Funny

My husband recently pointed out to me that I keep mentioning that I am going to tell you about my crap month but I never have. Part of that is because when I'm able to take a step back and look at it, I hate to tell it because it sounds like whining. I  hate whining.

Truth is it's just hard to sit down and collect my thoughts about it without getting all emotional and saying things like, "If only we would have gone to a different park....If only this....If only that."

So, here's the deal, and I'll try not to be a weenie about it.

A few weeks ago, the very first nice day that we had, the kids came home from school and Big Boy promptly changed into shorts and Little Boy promptly asked if we could go get ice cream.

Since we already had ice cream earlier in the week I decided maybe we should go to the park. They love the park.

They were good with that so we headed in the general direction of 2 parks that are really close to each other. I wanted to stop at the first one, which is smaller, because the second one has unsavory characters at times. Besides me, I mean.

The boys were talking about which one we should visit and eventually the bigger park won out. Big Boy always gives in so that he doesn't have to hear LB whine. Sad, huh?

Anyway, we get to the park, nobody is there and I go plop my big butt down on a bench where I can see them play.

Big Boy doesn't want to play because he's pissed we didn't go to the other park. I told him to do whatever he wants, sit and pout or get up and enjoy the sun.

Eventually he gets up and goes to play.

A few minutes later I look up to see him hauling ass across the monkey bars. These bars are really high, but there he goes! I was amazed because I've never seen him do the monkey bars. He's always been pretty timid, not real physical or outgoing with that stuff because he's kind of scared of getting hurt. He's not a dare devil, at all.

I was so excited I got up and got my phone ready to take a video so we could show his dad. My phone was being a jerkface and took forever to get to where I could record so he kept going across but I was missing it.

Finally I got it and he got ready and reached out and grabbed on; his whole body was suspended mid-air for about a half second and then his hand just lost grip and he slipped off. Right onto the ground.

Yeah, I got that on video. The scream alone is enough to make me nauseous.

Of course I couldn't see anything wrong with his arm. He was concerned about his scraped up knee and having bark dust in his mouth. He held onto his arm but didn't say much.

We went and sat on the bench and he told me his arm hurt and I looked and it was red, but that was it, just red. Like he fell on it, ya know?

He kept kind of whimpering and I told him to go to the car if he was going to do that because, "I really don't wanna hear you crying, you're not hurt, you're just scraped up." <--- shoot me in the face.

He went to the car. A few minutes later Little Boy decided he was done and wanted to leave. So we went and got in the car.

Big Boy's arm looked a little swollen at this point, but I assumed that it was because he had fallen on it and bruised it, etc.

This park is literally 3 minutes from home. By the time we got home, I got out and opened the door for him because he couldn't use his arm (rolling my eyes because i thought he was being silly) and looked at his elbow it had drastically changed.

It was swollen and in the weirdest position. I didn't even let him out of the car, I just told him to sit back down and we headed to Urgent Care.

Long story short, after xrays and inadvertently popping his elbow back into joint during the xrays, they concluded he had a broken arm. We misunderstood or the Dr. didn't explain it very well because we were under the impression it was a broken ulna.

Do not break your arm on a Friday afternoon, people. 9-5 Dr's don't want to deal with it. They put him in a sling that was way too big for him and didn't work real well, and sent us home with an appointment for the following Tuesday with the ortho. Told us to give him ibuprofen if it hurt and to keep it elevated with ice. The Dr. mentioned the possibility of pins having to be inserted if the ortho found what he suspected on the xray, but we weren't clear on it.

All weekend the little guy was totally fine. Didn't complain of any pain, nothing. Sunday night we unwrapped his arm and very gently re-wrapped it because it was getting loose. It was really ugly with green bruises.

He went to school Monday. Still no pain.

Tuesday we went to the ortho where we were informed that he actually broke his humerus, down into the growth plate and elbow joint.

The words that are scary here are "growth plate." This is what helps your arm to grow at a normal rate and it's very important to not ever break it because it could effect your adult arm. Think of an adult with an arm the size of an 8 year olds, okay?

The words from the ortho were to this effect: "This is a bad break that is going to require surgery. We won't know how extensive it is until we get in there and look around. Definitely some pins need inserted and hopefully it will be external (as in they remove them in the Dr's office with little to no pain) as that's easiest and less expensive. I'm going to be very aggressive with this injury and I'm doing surgery on it tomorrow morning. He has a cold but I can't wait like I would usually do because this break requires immediate attention."

Something like that, anyway. I'm paraphrasing here, gimme a break! You know what I heard??

I heard: "You should have went to a different park. You should have just went for ice cream, who cares if they'd had it already that week. You should have believed he was hurt worse than you thought. You shouldn't have rolled your eyes. You shouldn't have let him go to school yesterday. You are the worst mom ever!"

I think my husband heard this..."Cha ching cha ching cha ching." Haha. <-- sorta.

The next day, a full 5 days after the fall, we took him into surgery. They estimated 45 minutes.

A couple hours later the nurse came out and said, "There were more complications than they originally thought...blah blah blah blah...."

I heard, "Complications. Due to complications your son has....fill in the blank."

WHY did the nurse do that? Why didn't he start with, "Your son is great, but the break is more complicated than we thought blah blah blah."

After my small heart attack where I literally almost puked right in my own lap and I regained feeling in hands and legs and my vision returned (you know how you feel when you're gonna black out? yeah, i had that.) I was able to process what had happened.

Break was more complicated when they went in. He took xrays every few seconds to be sure he was getting everything perfectly aligned. He is a very conscientious surgeon and was being aggressive and precise. Thank God for him.

So now my son has 2 pins in his arm. One is embedded right under the surgical incision and one is poking out. <--- reading that back makes me shudder.

This Wednesday they have to go back to surgery to remove his cast, pull the pin and surgically remove the other. They will also validate to make sure that everything is healing properly. Then he will return to either a full cast if it's not healing as quickly as they assume it will, or a half cast if it is so that my husband and I can unwrap it daily and gently move it. Since it's the elbow we have to make sure to keep the joint working, I guess?

Part of me hopes it's back to a hard cast because I don't want to unwrap and fiddle with it. I'm skeered.

Now...you take all of that (and that isn't even all of it, i swear) and add to it: he had a severe cold and the anesthesia agitated his little lungs badly, his brother having problems with a little shit kid at school and the drama that brought + a cold, my husband having a horrid cold, and my having so much stress that I actually had some issues with my MS and you have the worst month since...well, I don't know when.

And you know what? The MS thing pisses me off. It down right makes me mad. I know that when you have MS your biggest enemies are stress and worry. They can throw your nervous system into chaos which is horrible for MS. So then you start to have an exacerbation and that causes more worry which causes more symptoms which causes more worry...and that's where the xanax comes in. But it pisses me off because...well...I don't have time for this shit! I have a broken kid, a horrendously terrified kid (little boy with his "bully" issues.) and a household to run.

I actually took xanax. I don't take that stuff, I usually power through, but I was overwhelmed and having the hardest time dealing. I still am having a tough time dealing. Usually I'm tougher than this.

And I know, I know..."It's just a broken arm...," but when it comes to your kids..."just" isn't in your vocabulary when dealing with their problems.

Anyway. The MS symptoms are waning, Big Boy is well on his road to recovery (just get me past this Wednesday without a heart attack, please), Little Boy's issue at school has been resolved and I had a fantastic Mother's Day.

And no wonder all of this crap stressed me out...just writing it down has stressed me out. I'm actually sitting here nervous just thinking about it.

I think I'm getting to be a wuss.

33 comments:

Amanda said...

I'm so sorry Mims! This is horrible! I hope everything continues to get better!

A Randomlicious Blog for the Soul said...

I'm glad you were able to get the arm taken care of and everything is looking up for you. I can understand as a mom that being hard on you. I would probably react the same exact way!
I remember when I was a kid I was running with my cousins and sprained my ankle, my parents didn't believe me and the only thing I think they did was put ice on it. I'm pretty sure they still think I was faking to this day but it really hurt!
I'm glad you had a great mothers day you deserve it!! :)

Myya said...

my heart hurts because you're right there's no "just" when it comes to your kids. Don't ya just wanna wrap them up in bubble wrap, oh how I wish I could do that sometimes.
Wednesday is going to go will because you have a rockstar surgeon &, well cuz I said so. Big loves from his ladies over here. xoxoxo

Beth said...

Wow- your kid has nerves of steel. If I broke anything that badly I'd be bawling and whining constantly. I'm sure it will heal well, and quickly, as kids do that healing thing REALLY well. Your kid has definitely earned ice cream now. As have you. :)

Mrs. Petrie said...

Ugh, sounds horrible, friend. Poor BB! You did exactly what I would have done. You can't run to the doctor every time your kid falls. It isn't practical. BTW, do you remember when my toddler broke her leg last year. Yeah, I waited for 3 days before we went to the doctor. I felt like the worst mom ever...EVER! And she was so tiny with this huge full length leg cast. I feel your mom guilt. Hugs.

Kelley @ TheGrantLife.com said...

Holy crap! I almost cried.. seriously. I can not even imagine. poor big guy.. and poor little guy. Im glad they are getting better. Its because your a good mom. Seriously.

Love you! :)

VandyJ said...

Seeing it all laid out that way makes me want to lock my kids in their rooms and never let them come out. But with my luck they'd climb the walls and fall anyway.
My thoughts are with you guys and I hope it all comes out OK.

Connie Weiss said...

Oh honey! You have been through a lot!

Cut yourself some slack!

I hope everything goes well on Wednesday. Praying...

Furry Bottoms said...

Aw, Mimi. Those "What if's" which sound very similar to "should have's" and are basically the same thing are a pain in the ass. All you guys did was exercise free-will and made your choices. How do you know that if you hadn't gone to the other park, something different would have happened to the little one or to you? You have no way of knowing. I feel bad for the broken arm though, and am amazed that he didn't complain of pain!!! Big brave boy. I wish I was as brave as he is when I broke my ankle and my nose in the same year. I still think you have nerves of steel. You're feeling extremely guilty, even though this break was nobody's fault. It just happened. Urgent Care is a bitch though. FIVE WHOLE DAYS without treatment from the time it broke!!! That ain't right!

Jessica said...

That stressed me out reading it. I'm so sorry, friend. You are a great mom. Really, there is no way you could have known it was broken immediately and you acted as soon as you knew. BB is lucky to have you! :) Can't wait until our little "date" tomorrow! <3

Candace Pelz said...

I know we've already talked about things a little bit but I just wanted to comment again and leave some :GREAT BIG HUGS: for you and your family. I am really glad you had a good mother's day! :)

Lourie said...

A wuss you are not. Your kid broke his arm significantly enough that it required a pretty aggressive surgery. meanwhile your other child is having issues with a bully. Add to that illness, and more stressors. No, you most def are not a wuss. Bring on the Xanax and pass some will ya! (((hugs)))

Terry said...

Yeah, all of this sounds like a tremendous amount to endure even without the MS symptoms acting up. You poor thing. You need a big hug. I'm glad that things are starting to settle down for you. Here's hoping that's the last of the excitement for quite some time.

becca said...

first hugs as a fellow card carry MS person i feel you and wow you really have had a tough go of it. I hope things get better and that Big Boy heals quickly.

Allyson said...

Ok, first of all, you are SO not a wuss. Secondly...I told my mom the other day that E wasn't moving a lot that morning and that I was eating frosting straight out of the tub to get him to move and y'know what she told me?? "Welcome to motherhood, you're going to be a nervous wreck for the rest of your life." And it's true. It doesn't matter that you went to that park or that you didn't get ice cream instead. Because you can't put them in a bubble and you certainly can't blame yourself for letting them have fun. The entire thing could have just as easily gone the other way. And you could be showing videos of monkey bar victory. But it didn't and now you have to breathe because "growth plate" anything is some SCARY shit. And pins sticking out sounds really gross. And uncomfortable. But you had an amazing surgeon (who probably would have NEVER made you wait 5 days for surgery because as soon as a bone breaks, it starts to heal). Actually, if you want to blame someone who actually deserves some blame, blame the dumbass who sent you home with Ibuprofen. He should have sent you to ER ASAP. It's his FREAKING job to know these things and to act on them. How are you supposed to know?? How much medical school have you had?? We trust our doctors and he totally failed you.

Also, please take your Xanax. My BFF from WAY back in the day has MS and when her daughter was born with a tumor and had to be trached from day 2 until currently (and she's almost 2 years old) just so she could breathe, I have NO idea how she didn't have a relapse, but I'm pretty sure Xanax was involved. You girls have to take care of yourself because a relapse is even less funny than a broken humerus.

I'm sorry. I think I just word-vomited all over your comments. Let me get a towel.

tara said...

oh my goodness, i'm stressed just reading about it!!!! hope his road to recovery is smooth!

Emmy said...

Okay I don't ever want to hear you call yourself a wuss again! You were dealing with a ton! that was a very serious break and when it is our kids it is horrible.
And it is so easy to what-if things, but what if you had gone to icecream and gotten in an accident before the icecream shop? You could what if everything in life but it doesn't fix anything.
I am glad things are starting to get a little better and calm down and girl you are amazing for dealing with all of that

Sarah Kate said...

I could literally feel my heart rate quickening as I read all of this. You are completely justified in every emotion you are/were having! You are NOT a wuss. Tough as nails is more like it. I am so glad to hear he is recovering, and that your younger son's bullying issue has been resolved. How in the world did you manage to not have a complete and utter breakdown during this?!?! You are my hero.

Stephanie McCall said...

bless your heart! he's one tough cookie.

Xazmin said...

I just want to hug you!

You really are an amazing mom. Stop with the guilt!

You take such good care of those boys of yours, and it just SUCKS when your kids are hurting!

I'm glad your MS symptoms are subsiding and that Big Boy is recovering, keeping my fingers crossed for you to make it through Wednesday with peace of mind!

I want to hear about how the bully situation got resolved!

Grammy Goodwill said...

Oh, I am so sorry to hear about this. You are not a wuss. I know I would have reacted the same way you did. And bless your son's heart! What a horrible thing to have to endure. I bet it will make for some great stores for him later on though. I'm glad you had a great mother's day. Best of luck tomorrow.

hotpants™ said...

I knew the short version from Facebook. I can't imagine going through this nightmare. I hope his arm heals quickly. Poor thing!

Shawn said...

You're absolutely right, when it comes to your kids "just" just insn't in your vocabulary! I'll be praying for you and him on Wednesday that all goes well with the procedure.

You're a super strong woman Mimi, don't forget that!

P.S. If you're not going to take your Xannax feel free to send them my way, you have my address;)

Steph said...

I'm glad it's all getting better for you! I already want to put our baby girl in a bubble. Why can't that be done?

I meant to text or email yesterday and tell you Happy Mothers' Day but I'm a slacker and forgot so, Happy Belated Mothers' Day!

BigSissyGirl said...

Awe! I'm so glad he is on the mend, and the school yard drama worked it self out. You are an awesome mom. Don't ever forget it! We all rethink our choices when bad things happen. It's not your fault. My son fell down our steps at around 9 months old & put his head through our drywall! Not once, but TWICE! Then when he was 3 yrs old, my FIL fell on him & broke my son's collarbone. I told him to stop crying after 15 min & was wiggling his arm all around trying to show him it still worked! NOPE, IT DIDN"T WORK! Ugh..mistakes happen, we just LOVE them & power on! :) Hugs to you!

Mamarazzi said...

this whole thing breaks my heart for all of you. i am so sorry that this all has caused your MS to flare up, that is no bueno.

poor big boy, what an ordeal, glad to hear he is on the mend.

poor little boy...i hope there is an end to the bully thing soon.

hugs my friend!!

Sheila said...

Oh my goodness! I am SOO sorry girlie! That all just BREAKS my heart!! If I could jump on a plane and go spend time with you and your boys, i would do it in a heart beat!!!
I will be thinking of BIG BOY tomorrow!
And SHOW ME THAT BULLY - I WILL WHOOP THE LITTLE BRAT! UGH! HATE bullies!!!
Big hugs to you!!!

McVal said...

wOW! You are having a crap month! And here I almost just responded with "yeah yeah, where's the video?"
When my son was 3, he broke his arm being thrown by a wild Shetland pony... My husband still wanted to go to the zoo, and almost didn't go to the hospital. The maniac who was managing the pony rides didn't want any liability and kept saying, kids are really resilient. He'll be fine! But my baby's eyes just rolled into the back of his head and he passed out. It was at that point that I was able to convince hubby to go to the hospital. Great... now I know what I'm blogging about tomorrow. I guess I need to see if I already did that one.
Anyway. I'm SOOOO sorry Big Boy got hurt! I hope he gets a glow in the dark cast because they're bada$$!!!

Ducky said...

Imma gonna kick that "wuss" right out of you. You are NOT a wuss. HOLY COW WOMAN! I would've been freaking the heck out the entire time!

Just makes me wanna throw up thinking about it. I would've requested a xanax salt lick that I attached to my belt loop with a rope. For Real!

Keep you and the family in my prayers. Mercy...

Impulsive Addict said...

I kind of got the gist of the story maybe on facebook? Anyway, it was painful to hear all the details and the fact that you have a video of it? Oh you poor momma! I'm glad he's on the road to recovery. That's great news! Saying some prayers for you. I miss you! xoxo

Date Girl said...

Oh you poor thing, and your poor boy!! Don't feel bad though-the key here is you noticed it the same day. When I was a kid, I broke my arm, and my parents thought I was being dramatic, and I didn't go to the doctor for a few DAYS. Nothing as severe as your son's, but still, my mom felt awful!!
Hugs to you-I'm glad things are getting better, MS, colds, arms, whew. What a nightmare. May is going to be a whole lot brighter.

Jen said...

Oh my gosh!!!!! Your poor son! Poor YOU!!! That is a bad month.
P.S. It did NOT sound like whining to me.
xo

Karen Peterson said...

After thirteen months of dealing with my fractured radius, I will NEVER tell anyone "It's just a broken arm" ever ever again.

I'm so sorry it's been such a crappy month for you. I hope things get better.